Guys, summer 2023 will be the season of your dreams, whether you want it to be or not.
All joking aside, this time off filled with beautiful days and the taste of the sea is perfect for changing our lives by 360°.
Summer is not just about sea and mountains, it is also a time for personal growth and a great way to boost self-confidence.
As you certainly know, this time of year brings out a lot of insecurity. Everyone is looking for the bikini physique and you start looking at every single ‘flaw’ with a magnifying glass.
Well you know in this internet space I don’t want to know about it, all physiques are bikini physiques.
If you have a body and the will to go there nothing should prohibit you from spending your time roasting in the sun. Each of us, whatever our shape and colour, deserves to live our life to the fullest. We already have many enemies in this world, let us not add to them ourselves.
However, in making summer 2023 special, we are not only talking about physique and ‘flaws’ but also about living in general.
In this article I will give you some small tips that if they happen will improve not only your summer 2023, but your whole life.
I am not an omniscient deity, so I cannot know the best path for you, but I do know that the following actions have increased my self-confidence and frankly, my will to live in general.
WARNING: THIS ARTICLE COULD CHANGE YOUR LIFE
So what have you got to lose. Let’s get started!
Mental glow up
Write a letter
Write a letter to the universe and say thank you for everything you have. You can also add what you do not have right now that you want to have/have.
I am grateful to have …., thank you for the opportunity to have…, having …. makes me feel…
Nothing complicated, simply think of everything you are grateful for. Your family? Your friends? Do you love your hair? Do you enjoy your hobby?
And also add what you desire, for example:
“I am grateful to have a beach house in this town and to spend summers there with my friends.”
This will not only do wonders for your mood, it will make you much happier, but it will also enable you to achieve your dreams because you will begin to believe that you can achieve them.
Remember, happiness passes, gratitude remains.
Related article: How to use writing as your free therapy
Positive affirmations work believe it or not
We are not talking magic here (although the effects are magical), affirmations are all science.
When you repeat something over and over again, every day, it becomes a truth for you.
If you repeat over and over again that you are ugly, you will believe that you are ugly and you will behave accordingly. If you think you are unlucky you will be unlucky. When you start saying and thinking over and over again how lucky you are, you will realise how lucky you are.
Why is that?
Simple, everything you see, everything you hear, everything you taste is filtered through your brain. If you believe one thing your brain will go out of its way to show you everywhere evidence to prove your thinking.
If you think you are funny and someone laughs, you will think they are laughing at what you just said. If you think you are ridiculous, you will think they are laughing at you.
The brain is programmed to find evidence for what you believe. So when you start saying positive things, your brain starts looking for evidence. Not only will your self-confidence grow by leaps and bounds, but your life will continuously improve.
Start and last for at least a month, every day. If you do this, I assure you that you will never go back.
When you feel sad, jealous, insecure or feel any other uncomfortable emotion.
Try to sit down, take out a piece of paper and write down why you are feeling what you are feeling.
Understand what that feeling stems from. Maybe from something that happened in the past that made you feel the same way? Maybe the anger you feel towards a friend stems from other things that were never resolved?
I assure you that understanding where your emotions come from will help you a lot to process them and let them go. Emotions are not a bad thing, it is what makes us human.
When we experience strong emotions the first thing we do is try to distract ourselves or not think about them. Nothing could be more wrong. Feelings must be felt (the word says it) and experienced until they go away naturally.
Sun, sun and more sun
In summer there is no shortage of sunshine and it would be a shame not to take advantage of it. We humans are much more like plants than we think, we have a visceral need for water and sun to live well.
When the sun’s rays hit our skin, our body produces vitamin D, which is absolutely necessary for the proper functioning of the immune system and for energy.
Furthermore, given the existence of ‘SAD’ the ‘Seasonal Affective Disorder’ or as many call it winter depression, it is known that the sun is necessary for our mood. In fact, being outdoors in the sunshine is important for our health and promotes good sleep.
In both men and women, it has been proven that even just spending 20 minutes in the sun three days a week dramatically increases testosterone and oestrogen levels.
Don’t skip this advice, there is a reason it is recommended by numerous psychologists, it works.
Physical glow up
Dress super stylish for no particular reason. Be a vision full of colour one day and total black another.
Try, fail and find what looks/feels best on you.
You know that dress you never wear because in your opinion it is ‘too much’. Try it on and enjoy a day without remorse, you will find that all the anxiety was only keeping you from shining.
You can do no wrong. Being the best dressed on an occasion won’t hurt you, on the contrary! This summer, no more doubts and second thoughts, make use of what you have in your wardrobe and what you find lying around.
Using the advice I am giving you, I turned my least worn dress into my favourite dress. I feel comfortable and look great, two in one. Give it a try!
Whenever we talk about how to be more attractive and how to attract more looks, posture comes up.
There is a reason why tall people are on average more attractive, they ‘pop more’. In a group of unfamiliar people you will naturally look at the tallest person straight away.
But this fortunately does not mean that if you are short it is over for you. Good posture in fact not only makes you look more confident but also makes you look taller, makes you stand out.
But how to have good posture?
Here are some tips:
- Roll your shoulders back to stay straight
- Practise at home, this way outside will come naturally to you
- Look straight ahead (preferably without stumbling)
- Put your back against the wall, the space between your head and your back
- Do pilates (doing pilates will solve ALL your problems)
Make your dresses
The satisfaction of wearing something created by you will far exceed any dress you can buy in the shop.
Moreover, it does not stop there.
In summer, most people find themselves with a lot of free time. And instead of being bored in the heat, you can occupy this time by learning something that we enjoy or that makes us grow as people.
Here are some things you could learn (physical glow up):
- Make up that brings out your strengths
- A good skin care routine
- Wraps for your hair
- Use psychological techniques to show yourself more self-confident
- Make healthy Smoothies that are addictive to you
- A healthy diet (remember that a good diet is for every weight)
- Doing hairstyles that make you stand out
A smile is the best make-up you can have
Yes I advised you to find the perfect make-up for you, but there is something better than any make-up you can come up with.
Silly I know, but it’s true.
Lately, I’ve noticed that instead of dissociating when I’m anxious, I’ve started to put on a big smile.
And it may sound exaggerated but it has improved my life.
A smile has a lot of benefits, by smiling we release endorphins, serotonin and cortisol, plus, just because of the hormones, smiling helps our immune system, makes us sleep better and reduces stress.
Smiling in a nutshell makes our brain happy.
So smiling in unhappy situations immediately makes me feel better, but not only that. I have noticed that seeing me smile, most people respond with a big smile. So in addition to making them happy, I also give them all the benefits shown above.
But above all, a nice smile on your face makes a good impression. Nobody wants to be in the same room with someone who every day looks like they just came back from a funeral (if you really have just come back you have a pass though).
Show everyone your beautiful smile.
Whether you have braces, chipped or missing teeth, it doesn’t matter.
You are not in the limelight in Hollywood people will just be grateful for the light you carry, never allow insecurities to diminish your quality of life.
So to recap, why you need to smile more often:
- it is a brain drug
- make your body and mind happy
- you sleep better
- you are healthier
- you make a good impression
- you make people smile
You have no more excuses, give a big smile or I will be forced to tell you a dad joke. Don’t challenge me.
“I want to live” glow up
Don’t miss opportunities to get to know new things.
You cannot even imagine how many opportunities all your ‘no’s’ have made you miss.
Recently a friend of mine invited me to an exhibition and I almost didn’t go, due to various insecurities but mainly because many times the comfort of our home is unbeatable.
In spite of this I was sorry to refuse so I got brave and went. I am very grateful I said yes. It was a wonderful day, we talked a lot, laughed, and met very nice people.
This little story to make you understand how important it is to say yes to things you feel like refusing. Of course I am not talking here about anything that can harm you or your health, for those you have to keep saying no.
But for all other things, give yourself a chance. In this summer of 2023 when you receive a good invitation say yes, the insecurities will disappear just by facing them. I believe in you, and in time you will succeed too.
Use Pinterest as an Instagram without judgement
Pinterest is not only great for growing a blog, it is really great for taking inspiration and inspiring others!
Instagram wasn’t bad years ago but now it has become a den full of judgement and hostility. Plus many people don’t spend more than 10 minutes a day on it (I am among them).
Pinterest on the other hand has remained great for sharing your favourite photos with others. People on Pinterest don’t comment much so you don’t get feedback in that sense.
But Pinterest is great for keeping a photo diary.
Of course you can also do this in private, just post the pins on private boards. If you put them public instead, your photos might appear to millions of people and inspire someone, you might even fit in some moodboards.
Apart from that use Pinterets also for its main purpose, get inspired! Make a folder with all the things you would like to do this summer and the general vibe you would like to have.
Look at it often and make it a reality.
I was shocked when, a few months ago, I realised how many mini adventures can be bought near me. And I am sure there are also wherever you are.
Doing a quick search, I found people offering horseback rides in the hills for like 40 euros (about $43).
But you can find everything. Tasting fine wines, hiking, making pots.
A great site to find things like that anywhere is Airbnb.
You really have no excuse to spend the summer locked up in four walls, challenge yourself and make 2023 special, you will experience it once, for better or worse.
A classic piece of advice that still holds up.
If you are a minor volunteering is a great way to gain experience that will help you in your future job search. You will also have unforgettable experiences.
Volunteering is great for all ages.
In a world ruled by capitalism doing something for good, without receiving anything in return other than gratitude, is priceless.
If you search your city I’m sure something will turn up but here are a few options for volunteering.
Places to volunteer:
- kennels and catteries
- charity centres
- small shops
- second-hand shops
- senior centre
- summer camp
Choose what kind of volunteering to do based on what you like best, this way you will make the experience very enjoyable for both you and those around you.
The article ends here, all these tips have come from my personal experience so I am sure that even if you follow just one of them, it will help you a lot in your daily life.
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